The only beef I have with the twilight series is this--Bella and Edward don't think they can live without each other--she sees no purpose in her life without him and vise versa. I was actually depressed when reading the parts where she talked about life without him, because in her eyes, life had no meaning without him. I know I know, I'm sucking all the romance out of it, but here's my thing: in theory, I've always believed I should be a whole person despite others who may come in and out of my life.
I've been taught and believed whole heartedly that our significant others, whether they be our boyfriend, spouse, whatever, should only be the icing on the cake. I never believed in phrases like"soul mate, "I can't live without him" because stuff happens (we get dumped, lose our spouses) and when we have to tough it out on our own, I think we should behappy enough to live with ourselves.
thoughts??
9 comments:
I totally see your point and agree with you, but I will say I really don't know how I would go on without Daryl. He is my life and I honestly spent my life looking for him (corny, but true)my life began with him, I had a life before him but with him my life is better and is always what I pictured and dreamed of as a young girl. and I truly believe one way or another we would have ended up together, we had many paths that would have led us to eachother if the one that did hadn't. But I see your point that life is not just about one person or thing and that life goes on with or without that person.
Yes, that movie is pretty cheesy about that. Very teenagery and dramatic.
But in real life I don't think it's quite that easy as you described Emily. Yes, we still keep breathing and can even be productive and happy again, we know we are important & loved by our parents, children and our Father in Heaven. But, we are taught that- "It's not good for man to be alone." You are a better, happier, more fulfilled woman because you have Michael and vice versa. Take my son Joel for example- The love that Sarah has for him has made my son blossom and grow into a good, responsible man. He has something to live for and strive for, he's a better man because of his love for her. That's what I think.
Thanks, Bren. You are so sweet. Emily, I see what you are saying, but I definitely look at my spouse as more than "icing on the cake". And I'm sure you feel the same way about Michael, but I get what you're trying to say. I see your point in real life, that our spouse shouldn't completely define us. But as for the book; I look at it as just that: a book. It's fun. It's make-believe. It's fantasy. And I think it's fun to get wrapped up in their all-consuming romance for awhile. :)
I agree with you guys...I think that my eternal companion and I were meant to be together because that is the plan the Lord set up for me. And yes, technically I could live without him, but I think the pain I would experience would feel like, "I can't live without him." I mean, is this series a bit too dramatic to be real life? Oh my gosh, yes. But that is what is sort of fun, I think.
I totally agree with you and what you are saying... I know you love Michael and are greatful for him but you were Emily before him and will continue to always be Emily. I try to explain this to so many people and they just don't get it. I know that you weren't saying you could or want to live without him but that you are your own person. PS I love the teenager drama in twilight or twinkle as Cleve calls it.
Em, I think you were just trying to describe how if you lost Michael you wouldn't go to Washington D.C. and break into the White house and shoot the president in order to die... am I right? So I totally know what you're saying! I would be devestated if something happened to Jaran, but I would have to move on and take care of my kids and not let it debilitate me, so I see where you are coming from!
I think you are very wise for your age. I think that comes from the great upbringing you've been given by your father. Your father was a great example when it came this this subject.
I am a firm believer that there are many people that we can love deeply. I do not believe that there is just one single being in this whole world that we are "meant to be with." There are good, better, and best for us.
Some people we love in our lifetime may be a really good friend, some are better as a brief love along your journey to becoming yourself, some are meant for you to learn something from, and some are better suited for you to grow with, and love throughout this life and the next.
I completely agree we all have to have other meaning and a mission in our time here on earth aside from our partner.
My husband does not define me. He does not own me in that I would be nothing if he did exsist. I would be devasted, have deep sorrow, and feel a loss I can't harldy comprehend if I didn't have my husband in my life. But I would go on. I would still be me. I would still be a mother. I would still be many great things without him. I know that you know I speak with a little experiance on this subject of loss of someone who holds your heart. My world did slow for a period of time while I grieved, and I tumbled a number of times due to my sadness. But my world didn't stop, and I didn't crumble. You pick yourself up and you learn, you grow, and you move forward. Hopefully being better because of the trial.
That is the reality of love. However, that wouldn't make for a great romantic drama movie would it? :)
My biggest gripe with the book is that Edward is not Bella's husband and they have not made an eternal commitment. She is mearly a teenager being over dramatic about a boyfriend. Cannon has read the first two books and I have tried to explain that heartbreak hurts but it isn't and shouldn't be that devistating to a teenager. I know Bella and Edward's relationship is different and they are just a story in a book but many teenagers LOVE them and relate to them and I think parents really need to have many conversations with their kids about heartbreak and that love will come and go and it will hurt but it happens to everyone and you will get over it. I just think there is a real difference between a dating couple verses a marriage. Moving on from a boyfriend break up is not only possible but inevitable.
I totally agree with you. I think love is so much stronger when you don't depend on the other person to make you feel happy or whole.
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